“No matter what size jeans you wear, you are beautiful. The number on the scale does not determine your worth. Food is fuel for your body, just like cars need gas your body needs food. Food wont make you fat ugly disgusting or anything negative. You are beautiful just the way you are. You are worthwhile. You are important.”—(via therealamandahendrick)
“Nineteen things I’ve learned before I turned nineteen.
1. Always carry $5 and a lighter with you (even if you don’t smoke).
2. Ask every person you meet how their day is going. Genuinely ask with the soul intention of learning how their day is. Ask the coffee shop employee. Ask the person next to you in line at Walmart. Ask your distant friend. Ask everyone.
3. Take many photos of yourself. Take photos of yourself when you’re happy. Take photos of yourself when you’re sad. Take photos of yourself because there are millions of trees in the world, and we all look at the same sky, but there is only one of you.
4. Stay in contact with your parents. Try not to hate them. They are the reason you have the ability to feel anything at all. Try not to hate your parents.
5. Opening your skin will not set your demons free. Open your heart. Open your mind. Open your hands.
6. Nobody knows anybody completely. That’s okay.
7. Be gentle, but be aggressive. Take a stand. Nobody hears your voice if you stay silent.
8. Respect everybody. We are all humans trying to survive. We all deserve respect.
9. Wearing black will ALWAYS make you feel better about yourself.
10. Always give tips, whether it be a couple extra dollars or a piece of mind. You never know how much you could be helping someone.
11. Change is the only thing consistent in life. Do not allow that bother you. Embrace chance and move with life, whichever direction it chooses to take you.
12. Smile often. Smile at strangers. Smile at your friends. Smile when nobody is looking and you’re alone in your bedroom. Smile when somebody is rambling to you.
13. Body image means nothing. Your body is merely just a seatbelt in the car. Your body is here to protect you. You choose the direction you go, and your body will not hold you back. Only you can hold yourself back.
14. Don’t hold grudges. Don’t allow yourself to hate anybody. Forgive them. Learn to love them for the person you never got to see them to be. Believe that a beautiful human exists in that person. Wish them well.
15. Drink orange juice. Lots of it.
16. Don’t allow the opinions of others to choose your destiny. We are all simply trying to live our own life.
17. Sing all the time. Sing off key. Sing in a silly voice. Sing like you’re on stage. Sing no matter who is around. Singing is breathing for the soul. Sing.
18. Take time to think. Write your feelings down. Write letters to the people you love. Texting is overrated and not as heartfelt as a nice handwritten letter.
19. Live for yourself. Breathe for yourself. Do everything in your life for nobody but you. This is your life. This is it.”—(via emptly)
I want you to understand that love and the lack of it will help you to grow and evolve and conquer. You were brilliant before you fell in love, you will be brilliant after you fall out of it. And you must know that there is a boy out there like the North Star who will guide you to loving both him and yourself and someday, baby, you won’t have to choose. Someday love will not bind you and you will realize that it takes a broken heart to survive in this world. You were built to last.
There will be days when you want to just throw in the towel and give up. There will be days when nothing makes sense anymore and you feel like happiness won’t show its face to you any time soon. There will be days of stiff necks and no sleep and sore muscles. People will be cruel. Food will go bad. You will feel like the world is out to get you.
But then spring arrives. Something big blooms in your chest. Sparrows sing to you and the air suddenly is clearer. You fall in love. You will grow a garden. Good things will start to come to you, beautiful people will find you. Remember those good things when the days get cold and the nights get long. Remember that you deserve to feel good. That you deserve to have good people and good food and a safe place to come home to. Remember that bad moods pass that all bad days end. And that no matter where you are or how lonely you get, somebody out there is looking for you and is waiting to for you to find them and give them your love.
“Find someone who makes you realize three things: one, that home is not a place, but a feeling. Two, that time is not measured by a clock, but by moments. And three, that heartbeats are not heard, but felt and shared.”—(via jdvlla)
”I think you could fall in love with anyone if you saw the parts of them that no one else gets to see. Like if you followed them around invisibly for a day and you saw them crying in their bed at night or singing to themselves as they make a sandwich or even just walking along the street and even if they were really weird and had no friends at school, I think after seeing them at their most vulnerable you wouldn’t be able to help falling in love with them.”
I need to talk for a minute about how grateful I am for my friend with benefits. Yes, we have a lot of sex. But we are also becoming really good friends. I am so happy to have him in my life, he’s exactly who I need right now. Not in a romantic way, just in a glad to have met him way.
Because of him, I have been able to finally close the yoyo chapter in my life, something I had been struggling with for months. I was getting really down on myself as a result of that weird not-relationship. I repeatedly tricked myself into thinking that things were changing, and that he was opening up. I was wrong, and I was holding on to the smallest seed of hope. The worst part is that he watered that seed, even though he knew how much it hurt me. That was selfish. We weren’t even real friends. He was never there for me when I needed him. And when it came to yoyo, my friends weren’t really there either. They stopped believing that I could walk away from him, and so I stopped believing in myself. I know they cared too much to see me hurt by him over and over, but I still felt so alone in it.
E has been such a blessing. He helped me see that he cares about more than my body. He thinks I’m a beautiful and kind and lovely person. He cheers me up when I feel sad, and he pays attention to me at all times, not just when he wants to get laid. We talk about things that matter, we vent, we eat pasta out of the same bowl, we take 2 40 minute showers in 12 hours, we hang out naked, we laugh, we cuddle, and we enjoy each others company. In short, he has convinced me that I shouldn’t put up with anyone’s bullshit, because I deserve better. I deserve better than indifference and tears and heartache. And I knew it all along, but I couldn’t walk away until someone helped me. And I still hate myself a little for that, but E tells me I need to forgive myself, and I cry. But I think I’m getting closer.
This morning, he told me that he thinks I ‘confuse sharing feelings with being crazy’ and that it makes him worry about me. I told him that he’s right, because for yoyo those 2 things are the same. I know I can share anything with E, but I’m so used to inhibiting that I don’t very often. I had a few drinks last weekend and tried to share some feels about my friendship with E over text, but I got scared that he would ditch out, and got kind of crazy. The next day, he called me to make sure I was okay and to apologize. He told me that he wanted to see me and that he wouldn’t abandon me just because I said the wrong thing.
I always pick the wrong people to have in my life. Connecting with E has been one of the best things to happen to me this year. I feel so blessed, and so grateful.
I realize this rant has made it sound like I have ‘the feels’ for the fwb. I don’t, which is unexpected. I can explain my feelings in one sentence that may or may not make sense:
“When sex becomes a production or performance that is when it loses its value. Be mutual. Be loud. Be clumsy. Make noises, be quiet, and make a mess. Bite, scratch, push, pull, hold, thrust. Remove pressure from the moment. Love the moment. Embrace it. Enjoy your body; enjoy your partners’ body. Produce sweat, be natural, entice your senses, give into pleasure. Bump heads, miss when you kiss, laugh when it happens. Speak words, speak with your body, speak to their soul. Touch their skin, kiss their goose bumps, and play with their hair. Scream, beg, whimper, sigh, let your toes curl, lose yourself. Chase your breath; keep the lights on, watch their eyes when they explode. Forget worrying about extra skin, sizes of parts and things that are meaningless. Save the expectations, take each second as it comes. Smear your make up, mess up your hair, rid your masculinity, and lose your ego. Detonate together, collapse together, and melt into each other.”—i got the chills reading this. absolutely beautiful (via blissful-unawareness)